My name is Erin, and I am a yo-yo dieter. It has been 28 days since my last diet...
Just kidding, sort of. In all seriousness though, I am having a really hard time sticking to any sort of diet program. Every time I start, I have the best of intentions, but it never seems to stick. I feel like a fraud when it comes to my diet, I post on here or Facebook, that I am starting a new diet. I do well for 1 or 2 days, then something comes up. Work, Eli needing a snack when shopping, a random trip for fast food, or Husband asking for dessert.
One of these days it will actually stick. Hopefully this is the day. I need to lose 150 lbs. 15 at a time. I have to tell myself it is just 15 lbs. Hopefully that will help this work for me.
This time I am drinking WATER. I am cutting back on portions. I am skipping the junk food. I am skipping a lot of the excess snacks. I am making healthy choices.
This time I will lose the weight. This time I will make myself happy. This time I won't beat myself up if I have a bad day. This time I won't fail. But if I do, there will always be next time.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Moving...Again
Husband and I have this really annoying habit. We tend to jump into things without fully thinking them through. They usually involve us moving.
Move #1- We moved out while waiting for his parents house to sell. We were supposed to be moving to TN with them. We couldn't afford to move. The house sold 2 months later.
Move #2- We moved to TN with no jobs, and a 15 month old. It took 5 months for him to get a job. We lived with Husband's parents for almost 2 years.
Move #3- We moved out of his parents house again. This time we moved into a second floor apartment. With a 3-year-old. Anyone else see the problem with that? (Our downstairs neighbors definitely do!)
So now we have:
Move #4- Hopefully this one will stick. We are moving to a wonderful townhome. It is about the same size as this place we are in now, but it has all kinds of things we don't have. We will have a patio, and closets. We will not have anyone above or below us!!!
The worst part of this move is the fact that we just finished unpacking. Or so it seems. We have only lived here a year, and we are on the move again. Hopefully this will be a bit easier than the other moves as well. I am hoping to get a LOT done next weekend since I have a three day weekend...(unless my new nephew decides to make his appearance!)
Pray for us. Husband and I usually HATE each other during moves. Thankfully after the move is over we are fine, but the move to TN included a lot of arguing.
Move #1- We moved out while waiting for his parents house to sell. We were supposed to be moving to TN with them. We couldn't afford to move. The house sold 2 months later.
Move #2- We moved to TN with no jobs, and a 15 month old. It took 5 months for him to get a job. We lived with Husband's parents for almost 2 years.
Move #3- We moved out of his parents house again. This time we moved into a second floor apartment. With a 3-year-old. Anyone else see the problem with that? (Our downstairs neighbors definitely do!)
So now we have:
Move #4- Hopefully this one will stick. We are moving to a wonderful townhome. It is about the same size as this place we are in now, but it has all kinds of things we don't have. We will have a patio, and closets. We will not have anyone above or below us!!!
The worst part of this move is the fact that we just finished unpacking. Or so it seems. We have only lived here a year, and we are on the move again. Hopefully this will be a bit easier than the other moves as well. I am hoping to get a LOT done next weekend since I have a three day weekend...(unless my new nephew decides to make his appearance!)
Pray for us. Husband and I usually HATE each other during moves. Thankfully after the move is over we are fine, but the move to TN included a lot of arguing.
Friday, March 9, 2012
Desperate...
Month after month with no luck. I don't understand. How could it have been so easy the first time, and be so hard this time?
Seven months of trying for another baby with no luck. Five months of no period. Then I finally get my period back for one month, and now I'm 5 days late and not pregnant. I don't understand.
I desperately want another baby, Eli is about to be four, and I wanted our kids to be somewhat close together. Everyone around me is getting pregnant, and it seems so easy for them. It was that easy for us before. I don't know what's different this time around. I have never felt so alone as I do now.
Don't get me wrong, I love Eli, and I wouldn't trade him for the world. I just want him to experience having a sibling. I want to hold a newborn again. I want to do it all over again. I can't wait to be pregnant, to feel the first movement, the first kicks, even with the terrible pregnancy I had with Eli. I won't mind being up all night with a baby. I won't mind going through the first few weeks of life with a newborn.
Eli also wants a baby. Every day he asks for a sister. He offers to share his room with her. It is so sweet, and I desperately want to give him this. For both of us.
Every month I think maybe next month. When do I decide there isn't going to be a next month. When is it time to let it go. To decide my heart has been through enough. That time is getting close. I am not sure how many more tears I can cry before it is too much. When is it time to let enough be enough?
Seven months of trying for another baby with no luck. Five months of no period. Then I finally get my period back for one month, and now I'm 5 days late and not pregnant. I don't understand.
I desperately want another baby, Eli is about to be four, and I wanted our kids to be somewhat close together. Everyone around me is getting pregnant, and it seems so easy for them. It was that easy for us before. I don't know what's different this time around. I have never felt so alone as I do now.
Don't get me wrong, I love Eli, and I wouldn't trade him for the world. I just want him to experience having a sibling. I want to hold a newborn again. I want to do it all over again. I can't wait to be pregnant, to feel the first movement, the first kicks, even with the terrible pregnancy I had with Eli. I won't mind being up all night with a baby. I won't mind going through the first few weeks of life with a newborn.
Eli also wants a baby. Every day he asks for a sister. He offers to share his room with her. It is so sweet, and I desperately want to give him this. For both of us.
Every month I think maybe next month. When do I decide there isn't going to be a next month. When is it time to let it go. To decide my heart has been through enough. That time is getting close. I am not sure how many more tears I can cry before it is too much. When is it time to let enough be enough?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)